Lately I Have Been Crying Alot....

What soap is to the body,
laughter is to the soul!
Yiddish Proverb

I have a beautiful daughter who is lost to herself. I miss her giggles and silly laughter. She has Autism and is now 11 and a half. She has made great strides in the last several years of her life. She had always been a sweet girl with a smile on her face. In the last several years she has been growing up and changing into a little lady. With this has come an attitude to boot! I am at a loss as to how to help her. She is now an angry,defiant and mad child. I say white and she says black. I pop my head in her room to say Hi and she starts raging at me. We are adjusting some of her medications and seeing a Behavioral Therapist also. Now I am going to take her back to the OBGYN and see if her hormones are out of whack. I have to coax her into getting up in the morning and get ready for school.While I am trying to coax her she is yelling screaming, hitting, and kicking at me. We always end up in a battle. She is refusing to come down to eat for meals. She has always been sensitive to an empty stomach and would get cranky. With the ADHD med she is not as hungry though. She is on 4 different meds and I 'm not sure which one is doing what anymore. She is lost to me.....


My girl always use to smile for pictures.....


Now it is like almost impossible to get a decent shot of her. We had portraits done for Christmas cards this year.There was one shot out of 20 individual ones of her with a half decent smile. I can't find the CD right now or I would show you our Christmas cards.


This was the one decent shot from the snow around Christmas.

I am not asking for a pity party! I am just sharing with you what the reality of my life is right now. The one bright spot is our precious Jon Jon! When I am crying he will come up to me and say "Why crying Mommy?" "Need a hug?" I will pick him up and he will kiss my face, wipe my tears away and just stay cuddly with me. There is nothing quite like this little man who is so sensitive and loving.



My special little guy. He was very proud of the necklace he made for his EI teacher.


When it rains on your parade,
look up rather than down.
Without the rain, there
would be no rainbow.
G.K. Chesterton

So, I am going to be posting about the things I am thankful for to remind me of what is good and happy in my life for the next several months.

1. Is for the sunshine today! It has been rather dark , gray and rainy here in the PNW.

I Am Back Sort Of......

I decided to join in on Sunday Snapshots that Stephanie from Ni Hao Y'all hosts every Sunday. I have been wanting to do this forever and ever and have just not done it. Life has been busy and a little crazy around here at our house. I don't really want to get in to it right now but would just appreciate all of your prayers for us and Princess. We are really having a rough time.


Jon Jon on the other hand is just the most precious child! It is hard to believe we have been together just about 11 mos. He is a Mamma's boy and I love it that he is so attached to me! He is in the birth to 3 yr. EI program here for his Microtia. We are starting testing for transitioning to the Preschool level. They have in formed me that is is highly possible that he might not qualify. We are in line for an FM system to try out. He's comprehension and communication skills are like in the 98% for his age. He does have some articulation issues though and sometimes he is alittle behind in using full sentence structures for his age. Hey, I think that is pretty good when English is his 2nd language and he has only been her for about 10.5 months. It will be interesting to see what happens. Otherwise he is above target in most area's.

He is a bright, sensitive and empathetic little one. He can still be Hunan spicy though and definitely likes his way. No is his favorite word right now it usually has an explanation tagged on to it though of why it is NO. He is finally letting me go out without him. Although at times he will still cry for me when I am gone. We are hoping to have a CT scan after he turns 3 for his inner ear. It appears that he has an ear canal on his Microtia side. If this is the case we are looking into what is best for him. I am leaning towards a newer procedure which is called the Medpor. They tend to open up the ear earlier so the child can pick up on more language skills during the critical learning period of 0-5yrs of age. If the canal is not there they follow with that procedure. The only Dr's that do this are in Northern CA. Which will mean traveling and staying down there for a while. For my baby though anything is possible!





So today I am all about celebrating life with my precious boy! I was so not planning on a boy from China.... It is amazing how God works though. I saw his picture and I knew he was my son. Love at first sight. What a blessing he is and he loves learning about Jesus and praying too! He always prays for the the pumpkin patch (when we went in the fall) and climbing the mountain ( our sledding hill).
















I hope to post more often as life is passing us by and I so want to stay connected to my bloggy friends. You are always in my thoughts and prayers.